Today I would like to formally announce my candidacy for President of this great land–The United States of America.
Like the Presidents before me I believe in the freedoms we fought for so many years ago–although some of us didn’t get those freedoms right from the start, I mean things take time…don’t get crazy!
I believe in the American dream where you work hard and get what you deserve–I mean the 1% of us work the hardest since we clearly make the most and the rest of you don’t deserve as much as we do.
I know that America is the best country in the world and we should work hard to help countries that are not as great as we are. If we help them they will love us and owe us a great debt of gratitude and so we will continue to perpetuate our greatness–duh!
I might have some more thoughts on this…but well I am too busy to think anymore.
Densil R. R. Porteous, II
The Next President of the United States of America